DATING 101: How to tell if a man is just pretending in the relationship.

   Author: S. Gordon-Jeffery

Hey ladies! How are you? Are you ready for our next article? Today I'm gonna talk about spotting the pretenders, the players. They're only with you to have a little fun and then leave when they get what they want. This post is dedicated to you ladies to help you spot the pretender and kick him to the curb early! Let's get into it!

1. He doesn't introduce you to family and close friends. 

If you've been with a guy for a short while chances are he may not be sure yet if you're the one for him. He may decide to hold off on introductions for a little while. If however, you've been seeing him for over six (6) months and you ain't met nobody...something is wrong.  

You may have the niggling feeling in the pit of your stomach, thinking something must be wrong. It is. After six (6) months, if this man is serious about a relationship with you, he would have already introduced you or be making plans with you to introduce you to the family and/or some of his friends. If he hasn't, he's wasting your time.

Some of you will say, "Well his family members may live in a different city, town or state." Okay, well the first opportunity he gets to see them should be your introduction to them. If that didn't happen, you need to rethink the time you spend with him. Do this...ask him about when you can meet his close friends. Men may have reservations about introducing girlfriends to their moms because they want to be absolutely sure. That is understandable. By the time they show you off to mom they have already made up their minds about you and they just want their mom or both parents to put the stamp of approval, so he can move forward. If you can't make it past seeing his friends after three (3) months, you're the side chick.

2. He makes up lies and excuses about who he's with/where he's been/his life.

Little white lies are still lies. If he told you he was going somewhere and you found out otherwise, that's a red flag. If you catch him in a lie and call him out on it and he tries to worm his way out of it with excuses, even blaming you for what he did, he's no good. Don't try to tolerate and be understanding. As the relationship gets more mature he will lie to you about more serious matters. The little white lies in the beginning are an indication of his character. If you condone it he will feel that it's okay to lie to you and he will tell you more serious lies. It's best to walk away before you get hurt.

3. He hides his cellphone from you.

If you're around him and you never hear the phone ring, that's a sign. In this age of digital connection where everybody is connected via phone and other devices what person has no one calling them? No one. It's okay for him to answer his phone when he's with you ladies. He does after all have a life besides talking to you! So if you're around him and you haven't heard the phone ring once, something is wrong. Ask him how come you've been with him and you've never heard his phone ring and listen carefully to what he says, not just how he says it, but the words he chooses to answer your question. Also, observe his body language. If something is off for you go with your gut. If you decide not to go any further in the relationship, it may be for the best.

Conclusion
Every relationship has to be based on openness and honesty. If there is nothing like that in your interaction with the man who you're interested in, you need to sit back and assess whether he is right for you. If you're just looking to have fun, then it wouldn't matter if he's lying to you. But, if you want a healthy, lasting relationship, the tips we have given you above should not be ignored.

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